However, my perceptions have changed. And when you perceptions change, your reality does as well.
A wise friend told me that we have to learn to love debt - not in the way of loving financial problems - but removing the control aspect it has over us. Finally, I now understand what she meant and can see it effective in my own life. I had a brain fart!
You see, when we're in these situations of debt, it's a vicious circle:
Now I am no debt expert or financial guru, but I have learnt one or two things along this road we call "where the fuck has the money gone." Firstly, don't hide. We're not bears. We must not hide in caves. It's time to confront our money issues, phone the people we owe money to, pay something and always, always communicate. Secondly, when we confront this we lose the fear aspect. Fear has control over us like a mother to a 13 year old child. Once we lose the fear, we lose the control aspect. We no longer feel that debt is controlling us. WE CONTROL THE DEBT! And this is the biggest break through.
I got myself into debt not through ignorant excessive spending, but just by trying to live. I then went self employed and the debt mountain just kept getting bigger and bigger, closer and closer - like a giant pimple on your face that you just cannot ignore. I then went back full time - it was time to take control. You can't get out of debt if you're not getting enough money in. Through self employment I did not have enough money to pay my bills. This lead to one or two account add ups and for example, I owed Woolworths 2x monthly instalments. Thus, I could not spend on the account. This in retrospect was a brilliant universal move.
You see I tried to erase my debt but when an account was paid off, I'd just spend on it again to buy the necessities. So the amount was never going down. Now that some of my accounts are overdue by two months I cannot spend on them. It's the universe's way of saying "Stacey if you can't control your debt, we will!" Having thought about this over a smoke I actually came to see the positive side of this. No longer did I feel negative about this, what a break through! It's a blessing because if I can't spend on them, but I pay where I can, that means that debt and each account does go down - eventually.
Then when thinking of a bad ITC record or black listing (which I am far from) I no longer fear this big black dragon. Not that I choose to, but if it so happens that I do get a bad ITC record or black listed then great. I don't want anymore fuckén debt. I don't want to get more loans under my name because once my debt is clear then I won't need loans. And yes, you're probably thinking.. what about housing and cars... well, that's what husbands are for and I could always get these assets under his name. But we're jumping the gun and because of the mental state I am in now, it won't get that far. I'm just trying to see the positives in my debt, I'm trying to love it. I am trying to learn to love money.
As petrol hikes, e-tolls and food prices soar, with salaries staying the same if not lowering, it is hard to manage your debt or even to survive. But come hell or high water... you survive. Somehow you make a plan. I was even discussing with my husband last night on how we can solve each others debts/bills. Working together as a team...viewing each other's money as united. Another brain fart! The trick is to get one debt PAID OFF COMPLETELY, then the rest will roll.
So all in all, most people currently are struggling to make ends meet, to put water and crusts of bread on the table. So it's time to get money smart, get those budget spread sheets working and start taking control of the situation. Change your perception of money and learn to love the green paper. I am 27, in financial crap, but hey.. when I get out of this hell hole, I'll have learnt a whack load of lessons and will never, ever, get back into debt. Money I LOVE YOU!
